Finding Alignment: The Journey from Corporate to Personal Fulfillment
I'm thinking we'll start is, you know, what's the what's the piece or area that is most interesting for us to explore today?
Speaker 2:It's yeah, being seen being perceived one. And then it's shedding light on like what's going on in my life two. And then three, it's being more publicly visible and in the messiness of a transition. You know, I'm so used to looking like I have my shit together.
Speaker 1:And
Speaker 2:this is a time where it's not to say that I always do have my shit together and I feel like I'm per like pretty transparent about where the messiness is in my life and interpersonal
Speaker 1:not having your shit together look like? What does that mean?
Speaker 2:Like, being in the process of, you know, in in a transition of not really knowing, like, basically what feels like a soul call to leave my corporate job and to pursue something on my own, which is that what I've felt is aligned my entire life and then doing it but not necessarily having a clear vision as to what that end product is. And I also view it as like a series of milestones but not even knowing what the next branch is. You know, it's like Tarzan swinging from one branch to another branch, but not knowing like what is the other branch, where is it going.
Speaker 1:You made the leap. And now what's what's the next branch that you're reaching for? And how do other people see what's it like if people see you when you haven't reached out for that next branch yet? Or they or you perceive that they're seeing you that, hey, this person doesn't know what that next branch is.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. And how to communicate about, like, how to communicate about like that. Like, such an is the word amorphous kind of time or like state? It's like a state almost. It's just like every day, every week kind of like waking up and it's like, well, what is being presented to me internally and externally?
Speaker 2:And like, how do I respond to those things in a way that feels like it's getting closer to the next branch?
Speaker 1:Mhmm. So maybe what we can look for today a little bit is what is that next branch because I'm hearing the lack of clarity for yourself and then also publicly feels feels difficult. I am curious first, though, what is what does having your shit together look like? Like, what is that who has their shit together? What are they doing?
Speaker 1:What does that mean? I
Speaker 2:mean, contributing to a visible outcome that has shared positive impact and reach probably.
Speaker 1:So someone who has their shit together is contributing to a public and shared outcome that has positive reach?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Like in it, I'm thinking of a team context.
Speaker 1:When was the last time you looked like you had your shit together?
Speaker 2:I mean, theoretically in corporate. Right? Like, you're on a path.
Speaker 1:What was for you?
Speaker 2:Internally, was a mess because I knew I was living in contradiction for so long, like for years, and it was very painful in my day to day experience. But on paper, I was on a trajectory. I was building things that were impacting people. I was contributing to a greater whole Even if I didn't care about, like, the end to to a degree, like, the actual outcomes I cared about making people's lives easier that I worked with and otherwise contributing to a system and helping it scale. And, like, having a it wasn't a defined role, but like kind of being able to define my role within that organization and, yeah, seeing how it could fit into the broader picture or how it did fit into the broader picture.
Speaker 2:So yeah, I just felt and I also worked in politics and that was definitely ingrained in the culture. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:What was ingrained in the culture and politics? I I don't know.
Speaker 2:Appearance. And we worked remotely too. So it was like, okay. What making your accomplishments visible. I actually wasn't I don't think that good at it.
Speaker 2:But the nature of my work, again, like kind of preferring to be in the back end at times. But again, my work was very visible because I was second to the CEO and I started a department that was very active and that they wanted to emphasize. And I was always just coming up with new projects that were making its way to the rest of the team where I had to teach on them or announce them or give updates on them and things, like, a weekly basis.
Speaker 1:Very visible. Very visible. And defined. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:I mean, I was defining it. But, yeah, it was defined within the construct of an organization and, like, what that organization was trying to do. And then me saying, okay. Well, this is an area that we can move towards per se.
Speaker 1:What I'm hearing is you're sort of looking for this unification of before, it was very visible. It was in a team context. It was more defined. But internally, you were feeling very misaligned. And then now, maybe you're feeling aligned and sort of on purpose, but now you're missing the external.
Speaker 1:So you're you've done the outward appearance thing. It just previously was not something that you inside felt totally aligned about. Right? So you're trying to unify maybe these things together a little bit?
Speaker 2:Yeah. I guess so.
Speaker 1:And so the visibility you're in this practice now of how do I make myself more visible if I'm not fully figured out in this new role that I'm in yet. And also, maybe it's a little scary to make yourself visible when it's something that's more meaningful for you externally.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Especially in like a professional context where a lot of my work and probably what I'm moving towards, I feel like it has to be more mystical. Like, I just feel like it's this inextricable part of me and it's like where my gifts are.
Speaker 1:I'm Part of
Speaker 2:Yeah. And then it's which is like inherently elusive and then fitting that into a professional context. Not necessarily sometimes through offerings, but even like chief of staff stuff like technically more corporate, but I'd wanna work with more conscious founders. I feel like that would be an aligned way of doing it. But yeah, it's like me capturing that within say a LinkedIn post feels weird, especially because 800 of my connections are all from my former life and didn't really know any, like, about this at all.
Speaker 2:Like, I would talk about it within a team context maybe like twice in my eight years there.
Speaker 1:Uh-huh.
Speaker 2:You know? And it was kind of obvious, think, by how I carried myself, but I was wearing my mask.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. Taking a vulnerable thing and putting it out there in a context that you're not sure exactly how how it's gonna be received. Mhmm. You know?
Speaker 2:I think one layer to add into that is also this past year has been a lot of learning how to even communicate about these things because for most of my life, I just was kind of taking in information and maybe journaling about it. But I wasn't actually I didn't really have community to talk about it with. So it's definitely been like, I felt felt like a toddler, like, learning to stand and to walk with how it's even communicated about such abstract concepts and in a way that resonates with people, especially, I think, business minded people because those are the people that I tend to gravitate towards. And I think, like, fit into a medley of my client or, like, the client base for the medley of offerings.
Speaker 1:Yeah. What I'm hearing is, and this is moving forward and it relates to what you've brought up, the practice that you're in is putting yourself out there in this external way, maybe on LinkedIn or other places, and seeing how that's received. How has that been received so far? Or do you feel like you're stopping yourself? Because you also mentioned you wake up, you have these ideas, you're coming up with the ideas in your head, the sub sec post or the name for something, but other people aren't seeing it.
Speaker 1:So when when does it stop? Where where does that process start and then get kind of stopped from happening of putting yourself out there?
Speaker 2:I mean, have been edging into it. I'm I've been publishing. I took a break from Substack but I would say it stops when I feel more like an old belief kind of come up I don't basically wanna deal with it. I'm let me see. Like it doesn't matter anyway.
Speaker 2:Like I I don't need
Speaker 1:to What be doesn't matter anyway?
Speaker 2:Like, doing something that's challenging. So for example, emotionally challenging. So for example, posting to LinkedIn. Feel like three people in the past week have, like, been, post to LinkedIn.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Which is a lot for my generator to respond to. Know, like, oh, this does feel like a whenever I feel something uncomfortable, I generally do push through it and, like, do the uncomfortable thing. But I think because there's been so many uncomfortable things, sometimes I am selective.
Speaker 1:You're right. You're protecting yourself from Yeah. Too much all at once.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Or even like another even more tangible example. It's like, okay, embodying the identity of a business owner. So one example is being visible in a public or like a professional public, you know, sphere like in LinkedIn and publishing accomplishments, doing outreach, all that stuff. Another example is, like, opening my freaking business bank account.
Speaker 2:Like, I still haven't done that. And that's an example of, oh, it doesn't matter anyway. I should just get the revenue first even though already did the LLC and EIN, whatever. Like, it's just taken me a long time to feel like it's worth prioritizing these super simple tasks.
Speaker 1:So you start doing something that would be a step along the path of what you want post to LinkedIn, open the account, and then this I don't doesn't matter anyway, shows up and slows you down and prevents you from doing it. And and what is that what is that doing for you? It's protecting it's protecting you making yourself visible or
Speaker 2:I view it as risk management.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:On the bank side, on the visibility side, maybe I'll just go back to that focus. I think it's protecting me from like the nervous system. I think my nervous system is where you're saying when does it stop? It's like a nervous system dysregulation of varying degrees, but depending on what the thing is. But with the visibility thing, it's like, you know, posting and then getting engagement on it or comments or whatever and then just feeling the eyeballs Mhmm.
Speaker 2:On me. And then I just feel a little bit like yeah. It just feels like a little scattered
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:In my my system.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. So even after you post and you you get views, do you want the views or you don't want the views? Would you want the comments?
Speaker 2:Yes. And I feel like that's something that's also contradictory is that I actually do like visibility.
Speaker 1:What do you like about that? What do you what comments do you like seeing? What engagement is something that you want? I understand these things maybe you don't want. What would you want?
Speaker 2:The feeling or if it's a feeling of receptivity, like something landing. So for example, when I announced the chief of staff work that I would be doing, I remember somebody I don't really talk to messaged and said, like, this is such a need in the market. So it's just kind of like that resident feeling like mutual resonance. So somebody who in my mind who, like, knows his shit being like, oh, this is actually needed in the marketplace felt really like part stand out to me among the other comments I
Speaker 1:got. Mhmm. Right. And so you're part of that equation is what's needed to create that resonance is for you to put something out there for that to be possible when it happens, it feels good. Maybe when you feel that someone else isn't necessarily seeing it in the way that you're wanting or resonating, that doesn't feel good.
Speaker 1:And I think there is a a fact with online life that that we can't control necessarily how who, how is this gonna be received. And like, maybe that surprise that you felt was like, actually that I'm surprised that resonated in that way for that person. And that feels good. Right? What I what I think is gonna be most helpful, we're talking about this sort of internal challenge from before in the job, but you were very visible.
Speaker 1:So you know what that practice is like. It just wasn't grounded in this internal alignment. Now you're outside of that, you made this leap, and now the internal is starting to feel like it's there, but you're worried about, well, people aren't seeing it visibly. Right? So the unification of these two is sort of what you're what you're looking for.
Speaker 1:Let me pause for a second. What is there anything coming up from what I'm sharing or anything you wanna say about that?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Something did come up of this sense of performing and how I really don't like it. So even at my corporate job, even though I was doing something very visible
Speaker 1:Performing meaning?
Speaker 2:Meaning like having to contort.
Speaker 1:Because why? Because
Speaker 2:I felt like it was what was yeah. It was like what was expected of me. But even more than that, it's like kind of like what the role I was fitting. Like, was presenting as a square. I was being a square within that organization.
Speaker 2:I had to present as a square. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1:Do you do you had to or you don't you've you've felt that you had to?
Speaker 2:I felt like I had to but it was the nature of the work like talking about stuff I think is so boring. Like, you know what I mean? There's only so yeah. Like to me, it would like it was like sucking the life force out of me to like talk about these really structured archaic to me or not archaic, but just really like thing things that I just could not care less about.
Speaker 1:So there wasn't actually a care there, you know, and that's good to recognize.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Aside from, like, improving something that was so clunky and then the impact that had on people, yeah, I didn't actually care about the work. And it was a lot of work, a lot of, like, elbow grease and that I had to put into it. That was just fundamentally like life zapping.
Speaker 1:Right. So you don't wanna perf you don't wanna perform anymore. This is part of this what you're wanting in the future is that that's a state I don't wanna be in again in that same way.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And I think to to tie it to the present is that in this time that feels so amorphous that defining it through even a single LinkedIn post. I know that's so dramatic. But I think that's like part of the emotional route is like
Speaker 1:Yeah. Trying to
Speaker 2:define it within a single I
Speaker 1:got you.
Speaker 2:Trying to present as a square Right. Again just feels stifling.
Speaker 1:So here's here's the piece then. Right? This is I think the key area. We talked about knowing what that next branch is. If I could see what the next branch is, if I could communicate what the next branch is, then I would know for myself what I'm working on, and it solves a lot of things, right?
Speaker 1:If I know the What next I'm hearing though is that if you don't try on ideas there while you're finding it, which is very normal for this process that you're you don't know and you actually have to try things on. And I think what I'm hearing a little bit too is that when you do that, it feels again like you're performing before, like like it was before, and then now that's stopping you from trying things. And so the way forward is defining what this next branch is. And how to do that is practicing and testing and having it not be the right thing. So it doesn't need to be so fixed as this is the next branch permanently.
Speaker 1:I'm always gonna this is always gonna be it. We do have to try it out. And I think that when that feels like performing to you, it maybe is part of what you shy away from. Does that kinda make sense what I'm saying?
Speaker 2:Yeah. I feel like I am trying so many things. The latest is just like a LinkedIn post.
Speaker 1:But how many of those things are visible and public? That's what I'm saying. That it's in the it's in that arena that stating this is my next rung, and letting that not have to be the thing that is permanent, that you can do that again the next week, and it can be a new thing, and that's okay. And that's actually pretty normal for the process for entrepreneurs. Would even encourage you to ask and talk with entrepreneurs about the iterations of what they started with and what they are doing today because I think that's a really common experience is that I'm telling everybody it's this thing, and then through learning in real life, in real conversation, which I think is another opportunity for you is to practice not just digitally, but also in any conversation at lunch.
Speaker 1:Here's my next thing, just state it and just explore it with them. And that gives you also feedback for the concept itself, market feedback in a way. But then change it as you realize it's something different. I think that practice is the thing that's gonna clarify that for you. I'm curious what you what you think about that.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And you saying that just kind of made me tie together that the feeling I have online is similar to what I've had in person. Up until like the past month, I was just saying like, oh, I'm doing whatever like, trying to figure out. So what I'm gonna say and lately I've just been saying, oh, I'm transitioning out of sabbatical and I do this, this and this. And that's felt a lot better whenever I was like kind of grabbing for what how to describe what I'm doing in person because I do like meet a lot of new people and go to a lot of events and stuff.
Speaker 2:I was just feeling like that same kind of almost like a shame feeling of like, I don't know what I'm doing and it's so obvious, you know.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. Yeah. Yeah. But saying it it sounds counterintuitive, but I think saying and trying on something that is does come from what's inside. I mean, you don't wanna just pick up some random thing that that would be the old way of doing it.
Speaker 1:Right? That I'm saying this because I think someone else can receive it a certain way. Find something that you think it seems like it could be the thing or has some excitement for you, and try those things on with other people. But you stating it right more clearly as a practice. And then you're gonna get real feedback as well from the market on how they respond to that.
Speaker 1:It's also market research for your concept. And so I think fitting it like you need to there needs to be enough commitment to it to get the real feedback and then adjust as you're learning.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And owning that process. And I don't know if this is yeah. And I I don't know if there's I feel like this does add color to the picture because I have posted to LinkedIn when I first transitioned. And then even to Instagram, I was like posting stories because it was making me uncomfortable.
Speaker 2:But I was like, okay, let me face this discomfort. But then eventually, I'm just like, yeah, I just stopped because like, this is just too much or it's, like, unnecessary or I've already announced that I have a sub sack, like, 10 times. I don't need to do it anymore kind of thing. So I just I feel like that's we all know that consistency in messaging can be actually really good because things are gonna resonate at different times with different people or whatever other reasons. But, yeah, there's always that kind of voice that comes in.
Speaker 2:It's just like, it doesn't matter. That it doesn't matter voice again.
Speaker 1:Right. And I think what can counter that is actually having something to say that you're excited about, that you actually think is interesting. Right?
Speaker 2:That's hard to talk about though.
Speaker 1:But it won't have the energy. It won't have the real there won't be the sustainability of it. Right? So it needs to meet the market in some way, and I think part of the doesn't matter as well. It doesn't matter to me.
Speaker 1:Right? It might just be, oh, wait. This doesn't does this actually matter to me? Maybe there's some question there. And so I think getting into a new concept, you won't know how much you're really gonna enjoy it or how much it's gonna change.
Speaker 1:But starting with something that has some excitement, has some passion, is like, if this is the thing, if this could work, I'm gonna present this because I'd be thrilled if this would work. So let me kinda commit to that and speak to that. And then just see how it's received. And then you'll get real market feedback, and that is a part of it. Nobody wants to hire you for that or there's no need, I mean, that is something we all have to contend with just generally.
Speaker 1:And you'll learn, well, what if I tweak it a little bit this way? I maybe if I do it's the same kind of thing, but I'm gonna present it slightly different based on market feedback. I wanna get to what you think could be some actions or practices that can help kind of maybe progress this forward. Again, to state it, this next what is this next rung that you're grabbing for? The next vine?
Speaker 1:I'm encouraging you to come up with three different versions of what you think the vine could be. You don't know, but here's three good ideas, all of which I'd be excited about. And then see what happens when you propose that more concretely in conversation and get the reaction externally.
Speaker 2:Well, I feel like I have defined those. It's pretty much the chief of staff services, human design, advising, which can be on a spectrum of, like, how casual to more kind of professional, and then coaching.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And chief of staff, I think I'm starting to because I've been doing, like, cold sales on it over the past week and a half and just kind of refining. And I'm just getting an intuitive sense with it that one of the ways I can iterate on it is specifically putting the call out to conscious founders or people who
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Yeah. That's like it it immediately can be polarizing, but that I feel like that's a good thing in finding the people that it'll resonate with.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Because that's part of why I haven't been lit up by the chief of staff stuff is, like, fitting into a corporate structure where I I feel like is dated and that I just don't resonate with. That's like I when I feel when I think into the chief of staff services, I think a lot in or feel into, like, how I felt in my corporate job.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. Which you're creating. It doesn't need to be that way. And so what what you can work on a little bit is what do I want that to feel like? What do I want that to look like?
Speaker 1:What's the feeling there? And how do I embody that as I'm putting it out there as well?
Speaker 2:And I think part of that is the conscious thing. It's yeah, people who are already business owners who are doing self work themselves and then implementing that in their businesses or it's behind their mission.
Speaker 1:And this is a perfect example of conscious, I think that frames it for you in a way that feels good. As you explore telling other people, does that word resonate with them? It might, it might not. And that's can still be okay. So what is it?
Speaker 1:I I like how you phrase it. What resonates for me is, oh, like, this is a founder who really cares about their own self growth and their lifestyle growth. And so the chief of staff position maybe spans both of those. That's interesting. That's different.
Speaker 1:That's something only you can provide.
Speaker 2:That's, yeah, something I've been playing around with of, like, the personal advising and then the chief of staff. Because to me, they're two sides of the same coin in a lot of ways. So
Speaker 1:get feedback from people on this is I'm really excited about this. I think it could be like this. Does that resonate for you?
Speaker 2:Yeah. And I already have expanders in that area. That's kind of how I landed on the conscious element is just kind of, yeah, observing some people in the Austin orbit who are there using that language and it seems like an identifier for them. But I don't know if I don't necessarily know if it'll like, work for me. I might have a different word, but, yeah, I feel like
Speaker 1:Yeah. Or other people resonate with a different word that means the same thing, and you can, yeah, you can see what they need and want as well because there is a in a service business, there's a service element in terms of what are people wanting and needing, how do they see this for themselves. And so, if we just went down this narrow path, if you've got three different areas that you're testing, each of each of those could be the next kind of rung for you. I think the more you externally kind of validate some of that and be in those discussions where you put yourself out there and say, this is what I'm excited about in testing, how does it resonate for you? The more feedback you'll get to adjust it to find what the fit actually is.
Speaker 1:And I would yeah. Maybe even just focusing on that. What are what are the resources and opportunities available to you right now that could progress those conversations with the chief of staff? That would be what I'd be curious about kinda leaving on. What's what's currently right in front of you that doesn't actually take a lot of effort that would further these aims?
Speaker 1:I'm I'm curious what comes up.
Speaker 2:If I think the obvious one is LinkedIn posts.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And then I'm already doing cold messaging and that's felt good just to kinda keep the effort going even if like, obviously not getting traction, I know I'm like checking off boxes.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And it's just a numbers game.
Speaker 1:It feels good doing it. You're you're shipping it and it feels good that you've done it. That's a good sign.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And I'm also shipping it specifically to people who follow like other conscious founders. So there's like some segmentation going on that that just feels more aligned. Yeah. That's
Speaker 1:That's really maybe what we're saying is that you're owning the label or the the position or the role.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. And making the ask too. Like, I think I subconsciously was avoiding sales and just kind of more of, yeah, passively or just going through network. But, yeah, it's been kind of fun to get back into the biz dev seat and just do cold outreach and see as a numbers game and not take, like, silence or rejection or anything personally so far. So that's that.
Speaker 1:I want to so that owning it, this is what I'm interested in. This is what I think I can provide. Doing that in conversation, getting feedback, and adjusting the offer, using different channels that feel good, whether it's LinkedIn or maybe email or in person. I think all these things are amazing. I don't wanna open up too much of another doorway here.
Speaker 1:There is just one other thing that I wanna leave you with that is interesting to consider and think about, which is this team concept as well. Because it felt like from what you had before, even though it wasn't the right fit in a lot of ways, There's something about it being even your definition of what is someone having their shit together, like, look like. Right? They're kind of doing it in a team environment or some shared collaborative environment. And so what I imagine and why I bring that up is that there's something to that for you as well is owning a role and but having that role be received, you know, a team or a collaboration or whatever that is, think is part of what you're wanting.
Speaker 1:So I'm just trying to bring up that word again because there's feels like there's something to that to me.
Speaker 2:Well, I think it's even like a more resonant word for me is partnership. So I even see that with clients of just, yeah, having that that team, that sense of team, like being within a client engagement to where I am providing the service, but there is kind of a back and forth with the nature of all of the three verticals that I'm talking about where, yeah, we problem solve together.
Speaker 1:And maybe it's what you can explore is team for you in collaboration one on one. Is it a team of five? Is it a big, you know, how do I like to actually be visible I in my
Speaker 2:think one on one.
Speaker 1:If that's what you're feeling then
Speaker 2:Yeah. I so far, I definitely can run the experiments more. But, yeah, a group too many people just gets complicated like we were talking about yesterday.
Speaker 1:Well, but I'd watch for I wanna be visible. I don't wanna be visible. There can be some holding back. It might be that actually you want a larger reception from a team, but it's it's also really uncomfortable. So just watch for that as well as or be open to the possibility of that.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Yeah.
Speaker 1:So I want I want to kinda close, you know, wrap here. Is there anything that you wanna reflect on? We can maybe both take a a moment, just a minute to reflect. I I wanna reshare this idea of kind of unifying the experience from internal and external and how I think the external role was visible. There's sort of this, like, four by four.
Speaker 1:Right? Like, the previous thing, the external role is visible. So it's ticking that box for you, the desire for visibility, but internally, you didn't feel aligned with what the work actually was. There was no passion, there's no personal involvement in that visibility. Now you make the leap out of that into this new space, and you find your internal alignment.
Speaker 1:But you're trying to figure out, but how does that now go to the external? Right? So they're kind of these mirror images and it's about unifying the two that I felt was interesting. And I also felt what was interesting was I feel like this lack of the next thing you're reaching for, your own clarity, and therefore, the clear the lack of clarity of other people. Like, because you lack clarity of that, then other people lack clarity, and then you feel, well, other people are gonna see me this way.
Speaker 1:And I think that is gonna come down to you defining and starting and getting feedback in the way we're talking about. And I think what's gonna be so thrilling for you is when you start to see that next like rope to reach for that is really exciting for you, something you can talk about with other people. Like, when all those things come together, that's gonna be a really exciting phase for you. And I can see how that can work, but I I and I think it takes practicing and committing before it's fully formed. So that's kind of what I what I heard.
Speaker 2:I think something that's coming up for me is not choosing dynamics that feel like they're they are out of alignment as I pursue different options. Like, for example, in, a client, making sure clients are aligned and whatnot. I think that's something that I'm I like, this is reminding me of how fearful I've been of, like, getting into another situation where
Speaker 1:Right. The performing. I have to perform in a way that I don't actually isn't real for me. What I'm trying to just one more quick thing on that is that that's that's within your domain now. And even then, I'm actually even a little curious.
Speaker 1:I understand the culture and what's expected, but and how much is is actually Right. Exactly.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah. But that's the thing is that's like my not my blind spot, but my Achilles healer, my kryptonite is like fall and this is actually in my human design, but is kind of being seen in a role and killing it in the role generally even if I don't like it and then creating expectation other people have a certain expectation of me and then it's like, okay. Well, I'm the one who built up this, like
Speaker 1:Right. You built it, and now other people see me that way, and you're you don't want them to see you,
Speaker 2:then you can so
Speaker 1:so what I'm what we're talking about this whole conversation is build from the ground up in the way you're wanting. Don't build the goals.
Speaker 2:Exactly. And I think like in trying so many opportunities or like talking with different prospective clients, it's even though it's hard, it's like staying true to like, what is my, like, my spidey sense say about whether there's alignment here or not because ultimately the they're not being alignment will not be good in the long term for anybody.
Speaker 1:Also if the work itself is formed from your own, like, excitement and desire, the right people will find you and align with that.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah. I think it's just when it's tense, you know? Like if I'm feeling stressed about like money or like my my my ramp, that same same kind of thing, then it definitely can dilute my
Speaker 1:Mhmm. For sure.
Speaker 2:My decision making or like make the decisions harder to make.
Speaker 1:Totally.
Speaker 2:Or to not, yeah, like fall into an older pattern. So
Speaker 1:But that's the opportunity in this new phase, right, is to to work in a slightly different way to be aware of that. So that's part of this. Every time that there's more stress around it, it's a reminder of why you're in this phase.
Speaker 2:Yeah. That's a good reframe. It's just like it's a each tense point is a chance to kind of relax more into, like, where I'm at now and that I do have the agency to choose
Speaker 1:what's Yeah. For my And that's why you left. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And I think too that's helpful, like, just compartmentalizing, like, that's something of the past that is not in my present day. I don't have to yeah. Like, I can choose with the awareness and the lessons learned from the past and, you know, with every experiment. And so on that note, just taking actions that do, I guess, work with visibility. And I don't know, probably going through one of my, like, setting a container of like, okay, I'm gonna do this for a month or two months or whatever.
Speaker 2:And sticking to it just to kind of go past the growth edge that or at least like the plateau that I've usually gone to with posting.
Speaker 1:And own it. Right? Own what it is externally so that you can get feedback.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah. Awesome. I think that's it.
Speaker 1:Great. Yeah. Well, thank you.